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Taking your first dance class can be a big - and sometimes scary - step
in your social life. In that first class, you will find a surprisingly
friendly, supportive group of people who are all in the same
boat.
As your confidence and your dance vocabulary build, you
decide to take the next first steps of entering the larger dance
community - maybe going to a Free Recorded Music Dance/Class Party. A
few familiar faces, the support of the faculty and staff, good food,
interesting conversation with strangers, a few mini-lessons from Walter,
and a bunch of fun dances with a variety of people - some of whom you
didn't even know - and you're ready to try a Saturday night
dance!
So there you are, walking into your first Northwest Dance Network dance, and suddenly this Inner Teenager rises up and swallows
the Adult you - and you just know that no one will ask you to dance,
that you will make an utter fool of yourself... (There is something about
the junior high dance experience that a deeply etched memory in each of
us.) So what do you do with this terrified Inner Teen? Pat it on the
head, give it a hug if necessary, and sit it on a chair in a dark corner
with a hefty Time-out. Climb back into your Adult self, and learn the
ropes of the dance.
Coming to the pre-dance workshop is a chance
to dance with a dozen or more partners - and gives you familiar faces to
look for later. Find the water jugs - this area serves as a great
"change partner" circulation area. Smile! Make eye contact. If you come
as a couple, dance with others as well. Tap your foot to the music.
Avoid sitting too much (especially too near that Inner Teen).
Talk to folks if you aren't dancing. And do your share of the asking
(both men and women ask at our dances, and it may be hard at first,
especially for women). There is a shorthand you can learn - that a
raised eyebrow or an offered hand can be as effective as words. If
someone says no, take it circumstantially, not personally. And if you
turn one person down for a dance, don't say yes to the next.
In Richard Powers' workshop recently, we were all discussing what makes us
feel good at a dance. Here are some of our comments:
- being asked to dance by a stranger. If everyone asked
a couple of strangers to dance, such good feelings could spread widely.
- eye contact from my partner (Looking away to navigate is one thing,
but looking to find a candidate for your next dance is another!)
- ENERGY! Bring upbeat energy to each dance.
- laughing at mistakes (A simple "Oops!" and a laugh lets you move
on in the dance, but do say "I'm sorry" if you run into someone.)
- dancing at your partner's ability level
Watching Frankie Manning (see his DVDs)
dance is a lesson in what dance partnering is about. Frankie's first
consideration is to make sure his partner is comfortable. He engages
with her and quickly finds her ability level with Swing-and the entire
dance is then devoted to making her look good-at her level.
Some
thoughts or beliefs can hamper a good dance experience. One is thinking
that every dancer out on the floor is better than you are. If you sit
down and really watch, you will find every ability level out there.
Often those who are having great fun look like they are great dancers,
but might be doing just Swing 2 material.
Another is believing
that a good dancer doesn't want to dance with you. Those who enjoy
dancing the most are those who understand the fact that dancing is a
team effort, that regardless of skill level, a common ground of skill
can be found and that dance is really about connection between two
people, if only for three minutes.
As Richard put it so
succinctly - happiness is what you bring to the dance (and hopefully
what you take home), not what the dance brings to you.
Oh - and
don't forget to wake up your Inner Teen and take him/her home-for good.
See you out dancing!
The staff at Northwest Dance Network
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